From Depressed to Purposed: Kristal’s Story of Redemption
“It was in the nitty-gritty of sorrow that God met me.”
My name is Kristal, and I am a cross-cultural citizen. My husband and I serve as Missionaries with an organization called Operation Serve International, operationserve.org. We live between Mexico City, Mexico, and Indiana. I am also the CFO of a local church here. I wear multiple hats! Full-time ministry, wife, mother, servant-leader. When people ask what my job is, I jokingly say, “It’s quite simple, to love people back to life,” but it’s not a joke to me. I have seen hell, survived, and when I see others facing hell, why wouldn’t I love them where they are?
My story begins at birth with two, drug-addicted parents. My mom was an atheist, and my dad grew up Presbyterian out of religious obligation. When I was 3-years-old, my parents became Christians, and from then on, life was different. They stopped taking drugs, got married, and moved from California to Indiana. They were radically different because of Jesus.
On my dad’s 30th birthday, he felt compelled to plant a church that stood out. He was tired of seeing segregated Sundays. He had a vision to create a church that resembled Heaven, where every tribe, tongue, nation, and race would be represented.
He started The Blended Church in 1992, and now we have between 2,000 and 2,500 people who attend weekly, with over 30 Nations. But that was his story, not mine…
Growing up as a Pastor’s kid, I was always told, “You will either grow up and be good, with an education,” or “grow up hating the church and living a bad life.” Imagine hearing that spoken over your life, weekly!
When I was 7, I knew I needed Jesus, and from then on, I lived for him until I didn’t. I did it all, went to Bible College, stayed “pure” all of that under a banner of simply proving to everyone that I would turn out “good.” I played the part, serving in church and being a good pastor’s daughter, all while living a lie. I bore no relationship with Jesus.
I faked it all until one day I met the man of my dreams, or so I thought. One thing led to another, and I found myself single, pregnant, and all alone at 27. I felt at that point, life was over for me. Depression gripped my soul so bad that when my daughter was 2, I was going to kill myself, and that scared me.
“I felt like life was over for me.”
Time passed, but at the lowest point in my life, I said, “That’s enough of living like this.” I got into some therapy, started praying and really seeking Jesus, and step by step, things changed for me.
It wasn’t instant; it took seven long years of therapy, praying, reading, and serving in my church. But I wasn’t faking it anymore. Jesus was more honest and real to me than ever before.
In 2019, I met my husband. We had two girls, and each of us had a child from a previous relationship. In 2022, we were asked to be missionaries, and Jesus is the center of our lives. To the single mom, I understand, to the person struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts, I know what that’s like, to the people blending a family, I see you. Life is not fair, and it’s tough, but loving Jesus, serving others, and loving people right where they are is what His word tells us to do. Everything else does not matter. My job is simple: to love people back to life.
God showed up in the darkness when it was just Him and me. I began to pray like I had never prayed before. Not shallow prayers but real ones. I remember praying, “God, I don't want to live anymore, but I have someone that needs me, help me.” It was in the nitty-gritty of sorrow and the darkness of my soul that God met me, and with some good therapy, I slowly climbed out of the darkness over time.
“But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive.”
Genesis 50:20
What would you tell someone in a similar place?
I would tell them to focus solely on Jesus and to consider therapy. I can tell you from personal experience that in all my time of serving Him completely, He has never failed me, not once, and always shown up. The joy and peace I have come only from Him. Even in dark moments now, I whisper to myself, "Kristal, don't break under the pressure if God is for me, who can stand against me?"
Please don't give up. There is a plan that God has for you and that path will always be hard, but God is on that journey with you.
Recommended resources from Kristal:
Delayed not Denied by Dr. Dehner Maurer // Book
Northcoast Church // Podcast
Daily Scripture Reading
